
As I sit here in the only available seat in the far corner of this coffee shop, I think back about 24 years to a very distinct childhood memory: being sent to the corner in kindergarten.
We were told to stand in a circle and then make the circle as big as we could while still holding hands. So we backed up. And kept going. As I backed up, I accidentally kicked some really big stuffed animal. Everyone started pointing and yelling “OOOOOOOOHHHHH”, and the teacher made me stand in the corner.
I had no idea what the hell was going on, but there I was, bawling in the corner. Of course, as a child you can’t control your sense of speech as you sob, with some unexplained breathing reflex kicking in that gets you all snotty and sniffly until you’re one big mucus-laden mess. I don’t even remember the aftermath.
I didn’t change a thing, and I was never again sent to the corner. Since I didn’t devolve into a life of crime and extended prison stays since then, I guess it was an isolated incident.

